In just one moment, happiness can change to sadness, a smile to a frown, life to death.
I stare out the open window to let in fresh air as this revelation settles in my bones. Where did i go wrong? Could I have paid more attention? I could have exercised more patience right? Sigh. Too late for that. No use crying over spilled milk. But what if you really didn’t mean to spill the milk? It just happened.
Get yourself together Toyin. Clean up the mess and move on. All I can do now is look towards the future. Nothing can honestly be done to remedy this. This was the only opportunity in a long time to come and POOF! gone. Just like that.
In fact it’s none of my fault. The situation is very volatile. Everybody I know that has encountered this has acknowledged that whatever happens here is not my fault. The situation is no respecter of persons. It was especially funny when Lola told me. She does this kind of thing on a regular and it always beats me how she still lets the same sad predicament happen time and time again. The last time, it also got her family involved. It put them in a difficult spot that her Dad had to go out late at night and work something out. I laughed at her so hard. She mustn’t hear that the same fate befell me today, if not I won’t hear the last of it and at this point I don’t even want to believe it happened to me.
Sigh. All these musings and I still haven’t found a solution for this. I haven’t even cleaned up the mess. My chest. I had so many plans for this. My heart was so expectant counting down the minutes till it was done. My schedule was cleared, I cancelled my visit to Lola’s and told no one to disturb my sensitive assignment. Why didn’t I even tell Lola to come so I don’t make the same mistakes? I know why. I was selfish. I wanted it all to myself.
I mean everything was going well until Yemi called me. All the smiles and cordial conversations finally paid off. I didn’t even give him my number and finally the bo…no the man I have been swooning over shows interest. I totally forgot about my sensitive task. We didn’t even talk for that long because he had an appointment. It was no more than 1 minute 37 seconds. Yes I checked my call log. 21st century and still no time machine. Technology my ear.
And so as I stare at the charred remains of my once browning sizzling dodo(plantain), I wonder if that call from Yemi was worth it.